I asked you guys what you wanted me to write about during a bout of writer’s block back in July. Several of you suggested I “flashback” to posts earlier in my therapeutic/trauma parenting journey to compare and contrast where we are then and now.
So, I looked back to my post from Sept. 20, 2012.
Then I red the whole month of September 2012.
There was lots of trauma and middle school drama wrecking havoc on our world!
Princess was out of whack. She wasn’t adjusting well to middle school and her anxiety medication was doing nothing for her. Her anxiety was out of control, she wasn’t sleeping well and she was flooded with shame for her wonky behavior choices (which caused more wonky behavior).
Some days I had tantrums or pity parties of my own.
Other days I got creative, like with a Bingo game of positive behavior choices, and helped her turn it around.
On this day last year, I posted a list of thirteen random things going on in our world. Princess was struggling with emotional eating (which meant I was, too). Milo was keeping me up at night. I sold an article to a magazine with a pretty big circulation for the first time. My friends were reporting seeing my work in their local parenting magazines. I took a detox bath. I was trying to cook more from scratch and we were eating lots of vegetables. I was doing a lot of reading. Princess had straight A’s, despite really struggling emotionally with school. I had just discovered Pinterest and had a garage full of the socks Princess was collecting for foster kids.
A year later….
- I’m still making time to read and am now determined to get in one of those detox baths this weekend.
- Princess is also a huge reader.
- We both still struggle with food issues, but she’s come a long way with hers.
- Finding time and inspiration to prepare healthy foods is still a challenge, but I’m doing okay with it. If only I could get motivated to start exercising again!
- Milo still keeps me up some nights.
- Opportunities continue to pop up to have my work in print.
- We called off the sock project after collecting over 20,000 pairs (WOW!) Adoptuskids.org contacted me to feature her story on their website just this week.
- The big change is that Princess is rocking it at school this year. Still good grades without the crazy high level of drama.
- Oh, and I pin frequently now (follow me! ).
Then I went back and checked out September 2011. Strangely, on September 20, 2011 I also posted a list, this one of my favorite things. My favorite things included nutella, the weather cooling down for walking/jogging in the evenings, fancy (and expensive) Popscicles, coupons and freebies, guest blogging, “Project Runway,” “Desperate Housewives,” morning drop off, Pandora, Katie Herzig and FitFlops.
The weather has not gotten cooler yet this year and I have completely fallen off the exercise wagon. We still watch “Project Runway,” but finished “Desperate Housewives.” I haven’t had one of those Popscicles in six months or so and try to avoid nutella (because I can’t stop eating it!) I dug out my FitFlops again after reading the post this morning and wore them today. Of course, they rubbed right where I got stung by a bee while Princess and BFF were at a swim lesson yesterday. I haven’t listened to Katie Herzig or Pandora in general outside of my dentist’s office in a while. BFF’s mom picks Princess up for school, so I don’t do drop offs, but this system has worked out really well for lowering Princess’s separation anxiety.
I also wrote a post on Sept. 20, 2011 about our favorite adoption storybook.
As I read through the September, 2011 posts, it brought back my joy and pride that Princess was starting to open up about her feelings. There were rough days with trauma triggers and separation anxiety, but she was able to start putting words with them after the meltdowns. (And now, two years later, she’s usually able to find the words before the meltdown.)
I wrote down some adorable conversations, like when she asked for our initial thoughts on her adoption photolisting and her advising her bored dad that her job is not to entertain us (something we’d been working on with her).
I wrote about her and BFF bouncing off the walls at play dates and how having another child in the house was a trauma trigger. Two years later, BFF is at our house at this very moment. Princess is doing her homework while BFF reads on the couch nearby. I haven’t heard a peep out of them in over an hour.
Princess was adorable at 10 and still so little girl. I miss those days, but I’m thrilled with the almost teen she’s grown into.
And there’s your first Friday Flashback! Trauma and school drama, but evidence of so much growth.
And some reminiscing about a really sweet and adorable little girl! OH, how I love her.